Bigmouthfuls
Bigmouthfuls
Bigmouthfuls
Bigmouthfuls



15 July 2007, 00:28  

A sorry story...


Well, long-time reader and first-time poster here.

Without further ado, here's one of my confessions.

At the point in time my tale is set, rather than a relationship, I was working on a friends with benefits arrangement. It was at 8 on a Saturday morning (a very rare Saturday morning, as I was in bed and wasn't still awake from the night before) that I got a phone call from one of those friends saying she was outside my Hall of Residence and wanted to be let in. To protect the very, very guilty, we'll call her Gollum.

Fair enough, I thought. She'd obviously been at the all-nighter at the local rock club, which finished at 7, which I'd missed for once. I decided I could probably stand to get out of bed early for the sake of sex... so I did. I opened the door then to see both Gollum and a rather bemused-looking bloke stood outside, both looking a bit the worse for wear. Turns out she'd screwed him then decided he was boring once the drugs wore off, so I had to help her make him go away. It's not as though I've never been in precisely that situation myself, so I decided to be generous.

After he's gone, we finally peel each other out of our clothes, and we curl up together.

The almost romantic moment is ruined by the drugs currently pumping through her system, which cause her to unleash a moist-sounding fart that must've gone on for five uninterrupted seconds, smelling like it came from the very arse of Beelzebub. I cough in horror... then realise there's a dampness creeping its way down my side.

'Gollum,' I ask, in my best deadpan voice. 'Do you need to go to the toilet?'
'... I.. think so...' she squeaked, and dashed naked from the room to the can, leaving only a spreading brown stain as evidence of her recent presence.

Of course, since this was now about 9 in the morning in an all-male hall, five of my hallmates were rather surprised to see a short, shit-streaked, naked and crying girl running past them.

My libido was officially extinct for the day.

But at least she paid for the laundry.

A sorry story...


Bigmouthfuls
Bigmouthfuls
Bigmouthfuls
Bigmouthfuls

MONSTERS OF COCKS


MONSTERS OF COCKS


MONSTERS OF COCKS
MONSTERS OF COCKS
MONSTERS OF COCKS

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